Hello and welcome back to Mad Fat Friday with Ace Jones! To commemorate this delightful occasion, I have assembled yet another not-quite-world-famous Mad Fat Friday Top Ten List!
Top Ten Things Ace Jones Loves About Halloween!
TEN: COOLER WEATHER! Where I live a summertime breeze is about as pleasant as the sun farting in your face!
NINE: Candy Corn! 
Except for Green Apple which will be mentioned in a future list.
EIGHT: SEC Football and tail-gatin’ like a BOSS! Placed at Number Eight in honor of my Mississippi State Bulldogs *heartfelt attempt at an* 8-0 record for the first time since they invented the football! Hail State! SEC! SEC! (Okay, really they’re 7-0, I’m just being optimistic. so now the Dawgs are 7-1 but that’s still a great record. Bama fans! Leave me alone! It’s not Saturday until tomorrow! LOL! It’s Sunday now and today we’ll stand behind you.The Crimson Tide is a brick wall. Bring another National Championship home to the SEC. Team first. Conference second. That’s how we roll in the SEC.) *Edits in gray*
SEVEN: The Color Purple! The actual color, not the movie. From the decorative lights to the crazy-eyed cats! I loves it!
SIX: All that chocolate that goes on sale on November 1st!
FIVE: Freakin’ mellocrème pumpkins! 
FOUR: REAL Pumpkins! Big ones, small ones, fat ones, speckled ones! I love ‘em all! In patches, on porches, or piled up next to cockamamie scarecrows! I love pumpkins! But I ain’t eatin’ one.
THREE: Cadbury Screme Eggs! Shout Out to the rabbit that clucks like a chicken! Autumn is so much better now!
TWO: Oktoberfest Beer! Hellz-to-the-yea-yah! Someday I’m gonna go to Boston or Bavaria or wherever the hell they make this stuff and I’m gonna marry Samuel Adams.
ONE: PLUS-SIZED HALLOWEEN COSTUMES! ROCK ON MY FELLOW FAT WITCHES AND SEXY BITCHES!
